Dating creative people
“But their popularity is ensured by their complete acceptance of their popularity.Raya is an app that’s supposed to reproduce that sense of cliquishness—it’s like, for whatever reason, are approved as members of a club.”Like in high school, the thing about cliques is, they breed conformity. Multiple times, snooty friends of mine have turned up their noses at the mention of Tinder, assuming I would use a “normal” dating app only if I’d never heard of Raya, or if—shock, horror—I’d applied and been rejected.The problem, of course, is that whenever something is defined as being elite or exclusive, it tends to attract status-conscious douchebags.Or at least, that’s the impression the app wants to give off.Another distinction: Raya profiles are displayed in a video—a slideshow of your images plays along to a song of your choosing.It’s not like Linked In, where everyone understands that you're there for work, and you can apply for a job.Instead, Raya creates the promise of something romantic, but it’s actually just people trying to be around other cooler people.” He shrugged.
Essentially, Raya is the “you can’t sit with us” of dating apps.
I shrugged and told The Artist that I just prefer Tinder—I’m a populist, not an elitist, ya know? (Hence why Raya is often called “Illuminati Tinder.”) The app has been growing in popularity, mostly due to press about its celebrity accounts—Joe Jonas, Kelly Osbourne, Skrillex, the hot one from But do we really believe that exclusivity makes something better?
I voted for Bernie Sanders in the primaries, that sort of thing. Sure, it’s sort of cool to swipe past lesser celebs while drunkenly prowling for sex on your phone, but you’re probably never going to sleep with those people. In reality, Raya is full of C-List models, social-media managers who for some reason have a ton of arty photos of themselves emerging from the ocean, people named Wolf, people whose bios say things like “racing driver living between Monaco and Tokyo,” and, like, a million dudes who claim to be successful fashion photographers, but in reality have less Instagram followers than some dogs I know.
Raya says it values creative achievements, but they’re not interested in and stay in on Saturday nights to read Walter Benjamin instead of going to Paul’s Baby Grand. Recently, the app rejected a friend of mine—an Iranian-American Doctor of Philosophy. Because Raya is like being back in high school, where the hierarchy of popularity is superficial and undeserved.
Basically, people are praised for being conventionally attractive, having rich parents, hanging out at the “right” places, and wearing the “right” clothes.“If you hang with a group of really popular kids anywhere, you often can't understand why they are the popular ones, and they don’t know either,” Sarah said.
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So the other night I was at a party, talking to a friend of a friend—one of those special types of New York artists who never actually make any art. The consensus seems to be: Why go to a party that lets everyone in, when you could go to the party that accepts only a select few?